Ode To My Attention Seeking Headphones

We met through a friend, I thought; ‘Why not?’
I needed to pipe music to my ear.
I paid my money to see what you’d got,
How I’ve come to regret how you interfere.

At first I was surprised at your length of lead,
Like a fool I pushed it to the back of my mind.
From that day to this you’ve done nowt but impede,
My every movement; you seek to confine.

Walking with poise in the city is hard enough,
Yet you wrap round chair legs, you catch on railings.
Living with your attention-seeking ways is tough,
You hook on clothes, you exploit my failings.

You’ve a jealous streak a mile wide!
You can’t bear for me to think of anyone but you.
You think nothing of becoming entwined,
And causing me pain and humiliation anew.

Bastard.

6 thoughts on “Ode To My Attention Seeking Headphones”

  1. Bobby pointed that out too. I think I’ll find myself one. I was going to get the iPod clip-on remote thing that’s also a radio ariel but they don’t make one in black yet which is a bit short sighted of them…

  2. Bravo! I’d actually loved to see this re-written with some tweaking to make it fit into an English Sonnet form. Thing of what you could do with the final rhyming couplet!

  3. Keep an eye out for kids who can’t afford the iPod wearing the headphones anyway but not plugged into anything. And then look out for the rest of the accessories – baby buggy, fag and mobile. The teenagers by me are quite dextrous in their ability to push their pram, smoke and shout ‘is it!’ into their phone.

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